Could you tell us about your short story in one sentence, for the readers who haven’t read it (yet!)?
Mayhem magnate, Jenny Bean, is determined to organise her belated fiftieth birthday party, but in usual calamitous style, things start going disastrously wrong, courtesy of a Wailing Wall of couscous, and a malfunctioning odour-concealer button on her Wee-Away pad.
Have you always been interested in (comic) writing, or did you fall into it unexpectedly?
I have always enjoyed comedy on the television and in books but becoming a witty writer wasn’t, as such, a career plan in the beginning. I moved into it gradually, after realising that my teenage poetry was too depressing for public consumption.
Have you ever kept a teenage diary?
My teen diaries were angsty neurosis-laden diatribes about how miserable it was being the only goth in the village, Northampton was an armpit, my parents didn’t understand me, and the other villagers thought I was in league with Satan and backed away doing the sign of the cross every time I graced the village pub in my finery. I wrote copiously about my secret plans to run away to London and join Soft Cell as their backing vocalist. It never came to fruition…
Later, when I was at university, my teen angst went up in smoke when I had a bonfire in the sink in my room and burned the diaries. It set off the smoke alarm and the Halls of Residence had to be evacuated.
We’d love to hear about where you get ideas for your wondrous wit? Do you have any tips you could impart to aspiring witty writers?
I am a huge fan of Coronation Street, and Victoria Wood. The Wood and Walters series remains my favourite comedy series (along with the final episode of Ab Fab where Patsy and Eddie are old ladies, and their knickers fall down in public.) A big influence is also Thora Hird doing Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads. I try not to keep hearing that in my head when writing Jenny Bean!
If you want to be witty, don’t try too hard. That’s my biggest tip. Tune into your surroundings and try to discover the humour that’s already there, waiting to be written. Humour is not merely a genre of writing. It’s an attitude, a way of looking at life. I get a lot of ideas from amusing everyday situations, ordinary people’s sagas and dramas, then I let my imagination take over and my muse does the rest…
Speaking of which, where does your writing magic happen?
My writing magic happens on my keyboard when I start typing, but it starts in my brain, usually with a line that pops into my head, the more outrageous the better. I’m often inspired by catchy titles or phrases, and definitively by good old rude English humour, jokes about farting and big knickers. Really, I’m just an overgrown schoolgirl with high cholesterol and a leaky bladder.
Here is a photo of my lucky bloomers. I wore these all the way through writing Calamity Queen. They were quite smelly by the end of the final draft and have since been washed. (The good luck stayed in, even at sixty degrees). My lucky mascots are Oscar Wilde and my dad, and my cat, Lucifer (all deceased)
What is the best piece of content by a witty woman you’ve read/watched/listened to/experienced recently?
That has to be the shoe shop Sketch by Wood and Walters. It’s bonkers, it’s genius and it doesn’t matter how many times I watch it. It still makes me widdle my gusset every time.
Finally, what does being published by CWIP mean to you? Do you have any advice for other witty writers?
I am thrilled to be part of this exciting venture, and to have the opportunity to get Jenny Bean (which is an ongoing series) out into the world! To anyone wanting to be a witty writer, I would say as I said earlier. Humour is more than a genre. It’s an attitude. Adopt an amused attitude to life. Be amused. Think of it as like putting on a pair of silly spectacles. When you look through your ‘silly’ lens, you will find humour in all kinds of unexpected places, and as we know, most humour turns on the unexpected. We live in dark times, so a good old chuckle is more important than ever.
Helen says “Loving the love of absurdity..."
Julia's short story "Jenny Bean, Calamity Queen" appears in The Book of Witty Women available to purchase now.
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